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Dr. Balis:
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Kelly? Are you all right?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I'm not feeling so good.
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Dr. Balis:
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Are you coming down with something?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I think the clinical term is "hangover."
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Dr. Balis:
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I see.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I'll never drink tequila again!
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Dr. Balis:
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Those sound like famous last words.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Oh. I feel sick to my stomach, and my head is pounding.
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Dr. Balis:
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Did you go drinking last night?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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No kidding! A few of us went to "Bull Market" after work. I was hoping Tom would come, but I didn't see him. I thought after a few drinks, I would work up enough nerve to approach him.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I started off with a couple of margaritas. Then they started doing shots, so I did some, too. Someone wanted to go dancing, and we went to the Trocadero Transfer. What a place! There were some weird people there with piercings and tattoos and strange clothes. I loved it!
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Dr. Balis:
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Did you have a good time?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Yes, at least what I remember. Most of the people from SII left, they said they couldn't stand the music. It was industrial-techno-dance music. I thought it was great! I could feel the floor vibrating. It was the best. I danced my ass off!
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Dr. Balis:
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Good for you.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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This guy there asked me to dance. He was really cute: he had long hair and great cheekbones. He had a ring in his eyebrow and about a dozen earrings. The great thing about dance clubs is that people don't talk much, and when they do, they shout. I can usually figure out what they're saying without too much trouble. I danced with him most of the night.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hmm.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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When the club was ready to close, at about one in the morning, he asked if I wanted to get coffee. I took him to my place and showed him how to work the espresso machine.
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Dr. Balis:
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You went home with him?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Yeah, I don't usually do that. But I was so drunk. And I think he was on something, because his eyes were big. I didn't have to say much. We never actually drank the lattés I made.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hmm. Did you practice safe sex?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Yes, of course. I used condoms. I feel bad now. I've never done that before--I've never gone home with a guy I didn't know.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see. I'm sure you are well aware of the dangers of going home with strange men.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I know, you are right. That's why I took him to my place--I knew the other girls would be there. Though I didn't realize until later that if Angie wasn't home, the other two girls wouldn't hear if something was going wrong. One of them has a hearing aid, but she probably turns it off when she sleeps. That's what most deaf people do.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hmm.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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He was so cute. And he was young, he looked like he was about sixteen. When we went to bed, he was sweet and gentle. It was really wonderful. It felt so good; I hadn't had sex in such a long time.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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This was something I always wanted to do--pick up some stranger in a loud club and take him home without him knowing that I was deaf. When he went to sleep, I started to worry--I was afraid he'd see the TTY and figure it out.
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Dr. Balis:
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You didn't tell him?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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The club was so loud, and he and I were both so messed up, I didn't think I needed to. I was going to tell him while I made the lattés, but we ended up making out instead.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I hardly slept at all last night. I left early in the morning, before he woke up.
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Dr. Balis:
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Do you want to see him again?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I don't know. I didn't even get his name. I hope he didn't meet my roommates--I don't want him to feel like I tricked him.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hmm.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I'm really starting to worry now.
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Dr. Balis:
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About what?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I don't think the people from work saw me--I'm pretty sure they all left before I did. I don't want them to think I'm a slut.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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This morning, one of the girls winked at me and said she felt like shit, too. She looked as tired as I felt. I don't think she knew about him, though. No one else said anything.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hmm.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I hope Tom doesn't find out. I don't want him to think I'm a loose girl.
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Dr. Balis:
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Are you still interested in Tom?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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My brain is too scrambled to think about that right now.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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But I really liked that guy--what's-his-name. All night, as I watched him sleep, I kept thinking how he looked like an angel. I had all these fantasies about him and I together, not the sex kind, but of us as a couple--I would teach him to sign, and we would go out to places together.
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Dr. Balis:
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Sounds nice.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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I know that's not realistic. But that has always been a fantasy of mine. It's like that movie, "About Last Night." I really loved that movie. I've always hoped that would happen to me.
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Dr. Balis:
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Isn't that film about a couple who try to build a relationship on a one-night-stand?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Yeah.
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Dr. Balis:
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That's very unrealistic. And I feel I must caution you about this practice. It may be appealing, but it can have some dire consequences. Did you see "Looking for Mr. Goodbar?"
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Yes, I know what you're saying: there's no way to tell if you're bringing home a serial killer.
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Dr. Balis:
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"They look just like everyone else."
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Ms. Wiseling:
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"Addam's Family"--very good. I can kick myself now. What I did was very stupid.
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Dr. Balis:
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But do you want to see him again?
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Yes, isn't that weird? I've fallen in love with the fantasy of him. I know it's probably not even close to the real thing. And he was so young. He's probably a total bonehead, just like my two roommates. I hope they won't give me a bad time.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hmm.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Do you mind if I leave early? I feel like I need a nap.
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Dr. Balis:
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That's probably a good idea. Perhaps even an aspirin or two would be good. And drink a lot of fluids--at least two full glasses of water. I'll see you next week, Kelly.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Yes, I'll stay the whole fifty minutes next time.
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Dr. Balis:
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All right. Take care.
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Ms. Wiseling:
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Bye.
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Dr. Balis:
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Goodbye.
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###
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Doctor Balis' Notes on this Session
Transcripts of Kelly Wiseling's Communications
