Transcript of 13th Session between Charles Balis, M.D. and Ms. Olivia Stillwell, Monday, April 27, 1998 at 4:00 pm.

Dr. Balis: Good afternoon, Olivia. Please have a seat.
Ms. Stillwell: Hi, Doc.
Dr. Balis: Happy birthday!
Ms. Stillwell: Why, thank you, Doc! You remembered.
Dr. Balis: Well...
Ms. Stillwell: I know--it's in my files. Oh, sorry about last week. With this new product announcement, I had more than my usual load to deal with at work.
Dr. Balis: That's okay. I hope you had a chance to celebrate your birthday.
Ms. Stillwell: My father and I went out to dinner. Aside from that, my birthday was just another quiet evening at home with Sherman.
Dr. Balis: That sounds very nice, actually.
Ms. Stillwell: It was.
Dr. Balis: How did things go with your father and his attorney?
Ms. Stillwell: Pretty well. I stood my ground and explained to them why I did not want to go ahead with a lawsuit. Mr. Bergen was pretty pushy about it, but my father called him off when I burst into tears. I just cried and cried. I kept trying to make them understand that a lawsuit wouldn't help me get over this or feel any better about what happened. I think my father finally heard me...I mean really heard what I was saying when it was through tears.
Dr. Balis: Mm-hmm. Where did things go from there?
Ms. Stillwell: My father asked Mr. Bergen to give us a few minutes to talk. After Mr. Bergen left, my father asked me why I hadn't told him this sooner. I was absolutely floored. How on earth could he not realize that I did not want to do this? It's not like that was the first time I'd voiced my opinion on the subject. Jeez! How long have I been telling him that I don't want to talk to reporters and that I don't want to deal with the State Department? I don't want to file a civil lawsuit period! Great Gertie-Schmertie! How many times do I have to tell him? So there I was sniffing, dripping, and whining. I'm sure Mr. Bergen thought I was a nut-case.
Dr. Balis: It's good that your father finally understood your feelings about this, Olivia, even if it did take a while.
Ms. Stillwell: Well, there's no doubt now. He was a bit peeved because they had done a lot of preliminary work and it all went down the drain now. After that, we left Mr. Bergen's office and headed over to my house for a long talk.
Dr. Balis: Uh huh.
Ms. Stillwell: By the time we got there, I was furious about everything. I said some pretty harsh things to him. I pretty much let off a lot of steam that had been building up.
Dr. Balis: What did you tell him?
Ms. Stillwell: Well, we started with the attack. His eyes teared up when I told him how much he hurt me the night I told him about the attack. He was really confused, so I spelled it out to him. When he realized that he totally blew off how I felt about the attack and my emotions so that he could go for blood and track down the attackers, he had to sit down and close his eyes for a while. I told him that when he did that, he made me feel like a tarnished trophy. And I told him that it felt like his only concern was getting retribution from the person who damaged his possession.
Dr. Balis: What was his reaction?
Ms. Stillwell: He said he was sorry and held me tight for a while. He tried to explain, but said that there was no way to justify his behavior.
Dr. Balis: Did his remorse help you feel better?
Ms. Stillwell: Not at the time. I was too caught up in telling him about all his faults. Upon reflection, it did help to know that he realized how he had hurt me.
Dr. Balis: Did you continue talking after that?
Ms. Stillwell: Yeah. I launched into what I call my Trophy Complex.
Dr. Balis: Trophy Complex?
Ms. Stillwell: Trophy Complex is all about being that perfect daughter on a pedestal. It is always knowing that Daddy will be there to pad each step I take and to make sure the world is perfect for me. It's being afraid to live my life and do the things I want to do for fear of his disapproval. It's always wondering if my life measures up to his expectations of me. Oh, drat! Do you have more tissues, Doctor Balis?
Dr. Balis: Here you go. It seems that you were able to vent a lot that night. How did your father respond?
Ms. Stillwell: At first, he was angry and told me that he did not raise me to speak to him in such a disrespectful way. So, I stuck my tongue out at him.
Dr. Balis: Quite mature, Olivia.
Ms. Stillwell: Yeah, I know. It still makes me laugh when I think about it. Don't bother to try hiding your smile, Doc. It's pretty funny when you think about it. My poor father just blinked a few times. Then I just burst out laughing! He stared at me for a few moments longer, and then he laughed a little, too. Then he suggested that I lay down for a while and that we would discuss all this later when I wasn't so weary. And I told him to quit patronizing me and to treat me like an adult. I swear, Doc, I thought he was going to have a heart attack!
Dr. Balis: Is that your pager, Olivia?
Ms. Stillwell: Yeah. Oh, wow! It's Jordan. He's in town and wants to meet me for drinks and dinner. Doctor, I know we have a lot to discuss, but can I leave early please? See? I can get messages on my pager. I didn't know he was going to choose an address across town--this is in the outer Sunset. I need to leave now, if I want to meet him on time.
Dr. Balis: All right. Go ahead, Olivia. Have a good evening.
Ms. Stillwell: Thanks a million, Doctor Balis! Thank you, thank you, thank you, and thank you!
Dr. Balis: Olivia, I'm glad you and your father had that talk. I'm looking forward to hearing more about it next week. Goodbye.
Ms. Stillwell: Thank you, Doctor Balis! See you next week!
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