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Dr. Balis:
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Hello Hal.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Dr. Balis? Wow, what a coincidence running into you!
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Dr. Balis:
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What did you do to yourself?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Oh, it looks like I broke my leg.
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Dr. Balis:
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And your face. Did you get into a fight?
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Mr. Mainor:
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No, I had a little accident.
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Dr. Balis:
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Oh?
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Mr. Mainor:
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I'd prefer not to talk about it, if you don't mind.
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Dr. Balis:
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I understand. How are things at home?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Uh, fine thank you.
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Dr. Balis:
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The wife?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Oh, she's fine.
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Dr. Balis:
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Kids?
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Mr. Mainor:
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They're all fine. Thanks Doctor. I'm not keeping you, am I?
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Dr. Balis:
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No, not at all Hal. I'm happy to see you. It's been a long time.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Yes, it has.
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Dr. Balis:
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Been busy?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Oh yes.
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Dr. Balis:
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Doing what?
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Mr. Mainor:
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This and that. Uh Doctor, someone is meeting me here.
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Dr. Balis:
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Using the hospital as a social venue?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Well, it's not exactly like that.
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Dr. Balis:
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I wanted to ask you if you managed to speak with Ms. Bows?
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Mr. Mainor:
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No I haven't. I really can't talk about this right now. I am in pain you know. I just can't sit here making polite conversation with you.
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Dr. Balis:
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Oh I'm terribly sorry Hal. How rude of me.
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Mr. Bows:
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Dr. Balis?
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Dr. Balis:
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Oh Mr. Bows. How nice to see you here.
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Mr. Mainor:
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You know him?
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Dr. Balis:
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Sure.
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Mr. Bows:
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How you feeling Hal?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Oh, I'm doing great Tom. Just great. Could everyone go away now? I'd really like to be alone now.
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Mr. Bows:
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What would you like me to do about your car, Hal? Should I have it towed to your house? With that leg, I don't think you're going to be driving it anytime soon.
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Dr. Balis:
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Car?
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Mr. Mainor:
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It's nothing.
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Mr. Bows:
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Yes. Hal had a little accident over at our house.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Oh God.
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Dr. Balis:
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An accident at the Bows house?
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Mr. Bows:
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Hal, are you going to be all right? I'll call your wife and make arrangements with her about the car.
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Mr. Mainor:
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No! I'm fine. Really. Thank you for everything you've done Tom. You've done more than enough already.
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Mr. Bows:
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But it'll get a ticket. There's street cleaning on that side of the street on Thursday.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Really, don't worry about it.
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Mr. Bows:
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As you wish. Do you want me to wait and give you a lift home?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Really Tom. I'll call a taxi, thanks.
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Mr. Bows:
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Okay. Well, I'm going to get back to Sylvia then. It was good to meet you, Hal. Good luck. And stay off those ladders, okay?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Sure. Sure. Ha Ha. Bye.
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Mr. Bows:
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And goodbye Doctor.
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Dr. Balis:
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And to you. Goodbye.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Oh Jesus.
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Dr. Balis:
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You sure you don't want to talk about this?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Oh shit. You must have figured it out anyway.
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Dr. Balis:
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You fell off a ladder at the Bows place?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Yeah, well...
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Dr. Balis:
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You decided to play a balcony scene with Sylvia?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Um. I was trying to be romantic. Women love that. But it's a long story.
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Dr. Balis:
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I've got nothing but time.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Great. Look, you trying to get some free entertainment? I'm on morphine and God knows what else. Right now, I've got to figure out what I'm going to tell my wife.
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Dr. Balis:
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You haven't told her about Sylvia yet?
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Mr. Mainor:
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I'm not totally crazy Doctor. I was testing the waters so to speak.
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Dr. Balis:
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And?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Piranhas.
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Dr. Balis:
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Excuse me?
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Mr. Mainor:
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There are piranhas in the water. I was lying there in a crumpled heap in her flower bed and that cold-hearted bitch was up there cackling with laughter. She really couldn't supress her glee. I couldn't believe it. It was like I was some clown in the circus delighting her with my antics! I put my heart into her hand and she giggled with pleasure as she squeezed it for all she was worth.
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Dr. Balis:
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You told me that you wanted to get involved with Sylvia to advance your writing career.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Well, that may have been part of it, but she didn't know that.
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Dr. Balis:
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She hurt your feelings?
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Mr. Mainor:
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Well, let's just say that it didn't go quite as I pictured it.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Look Doctor. I'll call you later. Let me figure out what I'm going to do now by myself, okay?
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Dr. Balis:
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Sure Hal. I'm sorry that things didn't work out for you the way you'd hoped.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Yeah, what a surprise, right Doctor?
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Dr. Balis:
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I'll look forward to your call.
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Mr. Mainor:
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Sure. Bye now.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hope you feel better. Bye Hal.
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###
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Doctor Balis' Notes on this Conversation
Transcripts of Hal Mainor's Therapy Sessions
