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Dr. Balis:
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Hello Anna. Feeling better?
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Ms. Green:
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Hello Doctor. Much much better. But I was very sick all last week.
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Dr. Balis:
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A 103 fever...
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Ms. Green:
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Oh it was just horrible. I finally went to the doctor and he gave me some antibiotics--Zithromax. I still feel sort of weak and tired even today.
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Dr. Balis:
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I'm sorry to hear that.
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Ms. Green:
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I mean...it's all right now. Really.
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Dr. Balis:
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Good. So shall we talk about your week?
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Ms. Green:
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Sure. Let's see. After I saw you last, I only had two days before I got very sick. And then I stayed home from work for a whole week.
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Dr. Balis:
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That's a long time.
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Ms. Green:
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Well I thought about coming...dragging myself in, but I managed to convince Julian that having the whole programming department sick with something horrible just wasn't in his best interest. In the end, he insisted that I stay home for as long as my doctor thought necessary.
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Dr. Balis:
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Sounds like a good decision.
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Ms. Green:
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If he'd have made me come in, the first thing I would have done was go over to his office and cough my heart out.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hmm.
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Ms. Green:
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I was feeling so bad I couldn't even read. I spent the first four days not even getting out bed. I just lay there watching daytime TV. Now I feel like I'm completely caught up on pop culture.
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Dr. Balis:
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I see.
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Ms. Green:
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Oh, Martin was very nice.
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Dr. Balis:
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He is here all ready?
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Ms. Green:
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No, not yet. He is arriving late Friday night. But he called me almost every single day. He was really worried about me. It felt very nice.
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Dr. Balis:
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That he cared?
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Ms. Green:
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Well it was just so strange after he left. He called me the Friday after my last appointment with you, but I was still mad at him for rejecting me like that. I felt like I really put myself out there--asking him to make love to me. To have him reject me and in such a strange way. I felt very confused.
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Dr. Balis:
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Did Martin try to explain himself over the phone?
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Ms. Green:
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When he called, I let him know that I was angry with him for treating me that way. I told him that I thought that he was playing games with me. But he insisted that it's not like that at all. He kept saying that it wasn't me and that it was him. But he wouldn't say what was wrong. So I really didn't get anywhere during the conversation.
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Dr. Balis:
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Did you talk again before you got sick?
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Ms. Green:
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He called again Sunday morning but I was already feeling crappy. I told him that it was all his fault that I was getting sick.
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Dr. Balis:
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How did you figure that?
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Ms. Green:
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That he got me so upset that my immune system stopped working.
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Dr. Balis:
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That's a heavy guilt trip.
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Ms. Green:
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He deserved it. And actually, in some weird way, he seemed to thrive on it.
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Dr. Balis:
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What do you mean?
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Ms. Green:
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I'm not sure exactly. It's just a vague feeling I get when I talk to Martin. And not all the time for that matter. It's just that sometimes he...I don't know how to really explain it, Doctor.
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Dr. Balis:
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Why don't you give me an example?
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Ms. Green:
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Well, when I was going on and on about how angry I was at him for mistreating me and how I was going to get back at him--I was joking of course about getting back at him--Martin seemed really interested. He kept asking me to tell him more. At first I thought he was just trying to be funny, to change my mood, to make me laugh, but it seemed like it was more than that. It's not exactly what he was saying to me. If I had a transcript of our conversation, I don't think that I can point to one thing he said that made me think that he was acting weird. But you have to believe me Doctor, there was something there. I don't know what, but...
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Dr. Balis:
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I believe you. So did the tone of the conversations change when Martin called while you were ill?
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Ms. Green:
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Yes completely. He was extremely concerned for me and was very distraught at his inability to actually be with me and help me. I told him that I'd rather it was this way--I didn't want to get him sick as well. He even sent me a get well present.
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Dr. Balis:
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What did he send?
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Ms. Green:
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Oh, it's really silly actually. He sent me a pair of shoes.
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Dr. Balis:
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Oh?
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Ms. Green:
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And I mean these were the most outrageous shoes I've ever seen.
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Dr. Balis:
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In what way?
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Ms. Green:
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I didn't even know that they made them like that. It was like someone took ballet slippers and attached a spiked heel on them. The heel is over five inches. This much! I'm not exaggerating, Doctor. The part of the shoe that the toes fit into hardly have any contact with the ground. It's like you have to walk on the tips of your toes but you have a heel to support you.
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Dr. Balis:
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You tried to walk in them?
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Ms. Green:
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Of course. I mean I stood up in them holding on to a chair. I was never good at wearing high-heel shoes, so these babies were way out of my league. I called Martin when I got them on and we were both laughing our hearts out as I tried to walk across the room in them.
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Dr. Balis:
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Did you ask Martin why he sent you such a strange present?
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Ms. Green:
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He told me that he wanted to get me something silly, something completely impractical. And I had to agree that these shoes were one of the most impractical things anyone could possibly own. I should have brought them in to show you, Doctor. You really just wouldn't believe that such things could even exist or that someone would be crazy enough to manufacture them. But I guess there are always people like Martin who seek out the strange and the bizarre. That's what I like about him!
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Dr. Balis:
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Did you have more conversations about his strange behavior and sex avoidance?
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Ms. Green:
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When I was sick, we didn't talk about that at all. I was too out of it to really maintain my side of the conversation. Martin was just trying to keep my spirits up by telling me funny things about his school and job search. And the last conversation we had was about those shoes. But I've been thinking.
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Dr. Balis:
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Yes?
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Ms. Green:
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Maybe he has a medical problem. A medical problem is just the kind of thing that would be very hard to talk about, especially with someone you're trying to date.
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Dr. Balis:
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What kind of medical problem are you thinking about...like impotence?
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Ms. Green:
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For example. What if Martin just can't do it? What if it stopped working or something? It would be very embarrassing for him to admit it to me. We are just getting to know each other. Maybe he feels like he needs to spend more time with me before he can confide such private things to me. I think if I had a problem like that, I wouldn't be too anxious to explain it to a person that I was very attracted to. I mean a person can probably be very sexually attracted to another person but if they have a medical condition they still might not be able to do it, you know?
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Dr. Balis:
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Did Martin give you any indication that that might be his problem? When you kissed and got close to each other, did you notice a physical problem?
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Ms. Green:
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You mean did I feel him get hard?
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Dr. Balis:
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Did you?
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Ms. Green:
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Actually I know that he could get hard. The first time we met in New York, it was very obvious. I even made a mental note that he was a very well-endowed guy.
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Dr. Balis:
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And last time you saw him in San Francisco?
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Ms. Green:
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I'm not sure. I don't remember. I think I would have remembered if it was as noticeable as last time. But I'm just...I guess this is another piece of evidence that there might be something physically wrong with him.
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Dr. Balis:
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Don't jump to conclusions, Anna. It might be that you just didn't notice.
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Ms. Green:
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Well what else could it be? Do you think Martin has AIDS and he is just trying to protect me or something?
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Dr. Balis:
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AIDS? No, that's not what I said. I'm simply saying that you just don't know. Did you actually ask Martin if there was a medical problem?
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Ms. Green:
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No. I didn't really think of it until this week. And I felt that it's not a good thing to discuss over the phone. When he gets here, I can be very supportive and understanding. I can try to make it easier for him to tell me if there is something wrong with him medically.
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Dr. Balis:
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So when is he coming?
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Ms. Green:
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Tomorrow night.
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Dr. Balis:
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And he is spending the weekend with you?
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Ms. Green:
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Yes. He is catching a plane back Sunday afternoon.
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Dr. Balis:
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And you plan on asking him about his...
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Ms. Green:
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Sexual problems when he gets here. I will probably wait until Saturday, but I'll definitely ask him. I have to know before we get any further in this relationship.
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Dr. Balis:
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Okay. Remember you can always call me and talk to me if there is something bothering you, Anna.
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Ms. Green:
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I think I can handle this, Doctor.
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Dr. Balis:
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Good. Then I'll see you here next Thursday at four.
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Ms. Green:
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I'll be here. I'll tell you all about it then. Have a good weekend, Doctor. I know I will. Even if Martin can't perform, he's still a very good kisser. And he does have hands!
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Dr. Balis:
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Goodbye Anna.
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Ms. Green:
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Goodbye Doctor.
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###
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Doctor Balis' Notes on this Session
Transcripts of Anna Green's Communications
