Transcript of 22nd Session between Charles Balis, M.D. and Ms. Anna Green, Thursday, December 5, 1996 at 4 pm.

Ms. Green: Hello Doctor. It's really nice to see you.
Dr. Balis: Hello Anna. It's nice to see you too. Frankly I thought I would see or hear from you before our regular session.
Ms. Green: I'm sorry to worry you Doctor. I don't know what came over me. I was so anxious when you were gone. I really tried not calling you.
Dr. Balis: That's okay. I don't mind you calling me when you're feeling like you need to talk to me. I'm just surprised that you didn't come in for a visit on Monday.
Ms. Green: Oh that. I told you that I just started to feel bad when I knew you were out of town. When I called your answering service on Sunday, they gave me a local number--so I knew you were back. I hate to admit it, but I called your answering service more than once. And on Monday I watched you come into the building. And then I saw you in your office through your window a couple of times.
Dr. Balis: So you've been checking up on me?
Ms. Green: Well...just a little.
Dr. Balis: So once you knew that I was back in town, your anxiety went away?
Ms. Green: Basically.
Dr. Balis: Did it go away completely?
Ms. Green: Well, it made me feel better to know where you were. I liked seeing you in your office.
Dr. Balis: I see.
Ms. Green: So how was your Thanksgiving Doctor?
Dr. Balis: It was very nice. Thank you.
Ms. Green: Are you going to go away for Christmas?
Dr. Balis: I'm not sure yet.
Ms. Green: Oh.
Dr. Balis: Does it make you feel anxious to think about?
Ms. Green: Yes. I really hated it. You being away, I mean. I had a really horrible Thanksgiving.
Dr. Balis: I'm sorry to hear that.
Ms. Green: Thank goodness I was sick.
Dr. Balis: Hmm?
Ms. Green: My parents just thought that I had a bad cold and wasn't feeling well. Imagine if they found out about you? My mom would just assume that I'm heading straight for a happy farm. Not that there is something wrong with the mental hospitals--I just meant that my mom would really freak out.
Dr. Balis: I understand. So you don't want your parents to know that you're seeing a psychiatrist.
Ms. Green: Why should I scare them? What they don't know couldn't hurt them.
Dr. Balis: I see.
Ms. Green: It's not bad Doctor. I'm just protecting them.
Dr. Balis: Do you ever talk to your parents about how you feel and what's going on in your life?
Ms. Green: Sometimes. But it's never like between you and me. I could never talk to my parents about sex, for example. I swear my mom probably thinks that I'm still a virgin.
Dr. Balis: Did you ever try talking to your parents about sex?
Ms. Green: When I was very young and curious about what was down there. But they always reacted so strongly. I think I told you about some of my attempts at communication with them.
Dr. Balis: Seeing your grandfather naked in the shower...
Ms. Green: For example. It was not a big deal, but they made it so that I remember the incident for the rest of my life.
Dr. Balis: Do you ever talk to your parents about your relationships?
Ms. Green: They are curious. But I try to keep it to myself mostly. Again, what they don't know couldn't hurt them. And it's not that hard not talking to them about this--we live far enough away that they are well insulated from my day-to-day life.
Dr. Balis: Are you sure your parents need that much protection? Maybe if you gave them a chance, they would be happy to be more involved with your life.
Ms. Green: My mom would love to get more involved. But it's just not for me Doctor. I find our relationship much more satisfying in that way. I feel I could be open with you. I know that if I say something controversial to you, it won't come back to me in the form of an accusation later. I'll save my parents for the time I have children. Then we can talk about how horrible their grandchildren are and we all can stay happy and friendly.
Dr. Balis: Hmm.
Ms. Green: I think most parents don't really want to know that much about their grown children. They say they do. But in reality they are happy being in the dark with their own illusions and fantasies. Do you talk to your parents Doctor?
Dr. Balis: Sometimes.
Ms. Green: That's what I thought. I bet you didn't tell them about me, did you?
Dr. Balis: I don't discuss my patients.
Ms. Green: Even the ones that are so in love with you that they freak out when you are away and track you down at your parents' house?
Dr. Balis: I...
Ms. Green: Your mom didn't ask who was the lunatic who called you all the way from San Francisco?
Dr. Balis: My mom knows better.
Ms. Green: Well trained, I see.
Dr. Balis: How about we talk about John. Did you see him last week?
Ms. Green: I saw him only on Monday. He also went to see his parents in Arizona. He left the same day I did and didn't come back until late Sunday night. But he did call me a few times and left me messages on my answering machine--so he cares.
Dr. Balis: Is your relationship going well?
Ms. Green: He says that he really likes me. He told me that he told his parents about me. He comes to visit me several times a day. He calls me at night to wish me sweet dreams. He's just around all the time.
Dr. Balis: During our last session you told me that you really liked him and enjoyed spending time with him. Did that change?
Ms. Green: What makes you think it changed Doctor?
Dr. Balis: The way you were just talking about John was...let's say you didn't sound very enthusiastic.
Ms. Green: I just had a rough week. It's not John. In fact he is just fine. And sometimes it's nice to have someone who is really trying to impress you and be with you. It's nice to be pursued, don't you think Doctor? Doesn't it makes you feel good that I'm so willing and eager to be with you? Just a little maybe?
Dr. Balis: I want you to have productive relationships with people that...
Ms. Green: Yeah, yeah. I heard all that. But it's not what I asked. Does it make you feel good that I want you Doctor?
Dr. Balis: I have mixed feelings about that. But mainly I feel like I'm not helping you as much as I would like to. I want you to be happy with who you are and with your life. Your desires for me do not contribute to your happiness and...
Ms. Green: That's very nice Doctor. I'm glad I can make you happy. I do want you and I do think about you and I'm glad you can appreciate it.
Dr. Balis: Let's talk more about John.
Ms. Green: If that would make you happy Doctor.
Dr. Balis: Do you think this could develop into a serious relationship? Or do you think of John as a short term distraction--somebody to go out with and be with until you find something better?
Ms. Green: That's sounds very cold. I do like John. We've been friends for a very long time. I wouldn't want to do anything that hurt him, Doctor. But as of right now, I cannot say that he is the man that I want to spend the rest of my life with. I just don't know yet. We need to spend a lot more time together before I can even begin to think about things like that.
Dr. Balis: How long was it before you knew Bill was someone you would consider marrying?
Ms. Green: That was different. There was more passion there. Bill and I were a lot more sexually attracted to each other. But a relationship cannot be based on sex alone. Bill and I were clearly wrong for each other.
Dr. Balis: Do you feel any sexual attraction to John?
Ms. Green: I told you that we kissed a few times.
Dr. Balis: Three as I recall.
Ms. Green: It's five now.
Dr. Balis: Is John someone you want to have sex with? Eventually?
Ms. Green: I know he wants to have sex with me.
Dr. Balis: Somehow I didn't doubt that. But what about you?
Ms. Green: Maybe if I think of you as I make love to him, it could work.
Dr. Balis: Hmm.
Ms. Green: Just kidding Doctor. I don't know yet. When I imagine John naked it just...let's just say he does not inspire me in that way. Yet.
Dr. Balis: I see.
Ms. Green: You do.
Dr. Balis: Anna, we talked about this before. You have to...
Ms. Green: Relax Doctor. I'll control myself. It's just that this last weekend, or week, I've been thinking about you a lot. And sometimes I just...well...sometimes I thought about you in that way. I even had some dreams where you made made me have an orgasm in my dreams. Don't look at me like that Doctor. I can handle it. Now that you are here, I don't have to think about you as much. It will get back to normal, you'll see. Okay?
Dr. Balis: Let's schedule our next session Anna.
Ms. Green: Same time next week?
Dr. Balis: Next Thursday at 4 pm. I'll see you then.
Ms. Green: Have a good weekend Doctor.
Dr. Balis: Thank you Anna. You too. Goodbye.
Ms. Green: Goodbye Doctor. Please don't be angry with me.
Dr. Balis: I'm not angry with you.
Ms. Green: Really?
Dr. Balis: Really. I'll see you next week.
Ms. Green: Bye.
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