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Dr. Balis:
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Alex? What are you doing? I didn't know you were here. Next time, just knock on my door to let me know you're here.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Hey Doc, how's it hanging? I was just looking down at the street to see if that guy was still following me.
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Dr. Balis:
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What do you mean? What guy?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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I don't know how to explain it, but I think he's following me or something. Last week...you know, those days that were real hot? Well, I went out and took a long walk down Market Street with my friend Roly. I would've still been asleep, but because it was so hot outside, I couldn't anymore. Anyway, Roly and I were walking down near the Embarcadero, when this guy comes up from behind and asks us if we knew how to get to the Ferry building. Now, this guy was nice looking and all--I mean nicely dressed and a big smile. Usually when they smile like that, they're up to no good. Roly--he was and always is more friendly to people than he needs to be--starts pointing the direction out to him and kind of flirting with the guy.
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Dr. Balis:
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Uh huh.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Anyway, the guy walks off and says thanks and all. But he lingered ahead of us and kept looking back. Well, I was getting a little nervous about him for some reason, and then even Roly noticed the guy looking back at us. It was real weird. Well, to make a long story short, this guy follows us into Taco Bell and comes up from behind while we were in line. He says something like he is so appreciative of our help that he wants to do something for us. We both turn around and he has this expensive bouquet of flowers and tries to hand it to me.
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Dr. Balis:
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What did you do?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Well, I didn't want to take it from him. But then Roly just sticks his hand out, takes the flowers, and starts to flirt some more with the guy, which is what I thought the guy wanted in the first place. So I ask him why he is going to the Ferry building. He tells me he needs to catch the Amtrak. Well, as soon as he said that, I knew he was up to no good.
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Dr. Balis:
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Why?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Hello? Doctor? Everyone knows that no trains come that far into the city. So then, I ask him where he came from. He tells me that he is from Gilroy and that he took BART into the City. I'm thinking, "Come on! BART doesn't go that far south." He must have thought we were idiots or something. Anyway, I tell the guy that we're in a hurry to get somewhere, we say goodbye, and Roly and I go over and sit down in the shade and eat. While we're eating, I happen to see that guy again. This time, he's across the street from us and is looking straight in our direction.
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Dr. Balis:
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Did Roly notice him?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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No. I'm certain he didn't. And I didn't say anything to him because he gets kind of weird about stuff like that. I just led Roly through some buildings and stuff to lose that guy.
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Dr. Balis:
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And did you lose him?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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I thought we had, but then this past Wednesday when I was doing my slave labor community work, I felt like I was being watched. When I spotted him, he tried to run away. I was starting to go after him, when he jumped onto the MUNI and got away. Then again today, as I was leaving the park--I got stuck with Delores Park by the way--I noticed him again As the bus was pulling away, there he was on the opposite corner looking directly at me!
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Dr. Balis:
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Did you see him again before you came into this building?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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No, that's why I was looking out the window--to see if I could spot him out there on the street somewhere. This has got me bugged something fierce! The guy looks familiar to me, but I can't seem to place him. When I told Benny about him the other day, he said it was probably that guy who was going around murdering gay guys all over the country. I'm like: "Thanks a lot, pal!" Just what I need--to get paranoid.
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Dr. Balis:
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How are you going to handle it if he shows up again?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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The only thing I can do is keep my wits about me and stay alert, you know? I'm already on edge this week.
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Dr. Balis:
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Why?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Starting this garbage pick-up bullshit has thrown me off. And sometimes I just get hyper, you know? It's like all of a sudden I get this surge of nervous energy and I can't sit still. First, I'll get the surge of energy, and then I do what I call the crash and burn.
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Dr. Balis:
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The crash and burn?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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That's when I just collapse. I lose all the energy I had before and I'm way out of it. That part is not so bad. It's the nervous tension I can't stand. I get shaky and stuff. And sometimes, my palms get sweaty like they are right now.
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Dr. Balis:
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I noticed that you've been shaking your foot.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Yeah, that's one of the things I do. I get agitated--that's how Benny describes it. Like he says, I'm full of piss and vinegar.
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Dr. Balis:
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That's an interesting way of putting it.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Usually, I go through this state where I'm so chock full of energy that I don't sleep for days at a time. But then, when crash and burn time comes, I can sleep for a full day without waking up at all. But during the energized state, I usually feel pretty happy and all I want to do is move move move!
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Dr. Balis:
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What do you do with yourself when you get like that?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Usually, if it gets real bad, I get Benny to give me some tranquilizer or something. But I don't like to do that too much, you know? I like to keep my head clear. Drugs never did much for me. I can't stand to be around Benny when he is tweaking, you know? But most of the time, I go out and walk all over town and try to burn it off.
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Dr. Balis:
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Do you do this at any hour?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Doc, you haven't seen this city--I mean really seen it--until you do two things. First, walk around town. Second, walk around town at two or three in the morning. It's very interesting, and you get to see all sorts of life going on out there. You can see all the riff raff and the homeless wandering around, and depending on what neighborhood you're in, you can see the rich people in their fancy clothes and stuff. It's real cool.
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Dr. Balis:
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I can only imagine. What about your mother? Doesn't she try to stop you from going out at those hours? Does she say anything at all about it?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Shit, Doc. Most of the time she doesn't even know I'm gone. She's either passed out drunk, or messing around with one of her boyfriends, or she's out running around herself! Jeez, right now she's off on some trip for ten days.
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Dr. Balis:
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What do you mean? Where did she go?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Last Saturday, I got the mail out of the box and brought it up into the house for her. There she was sitting on the sofa, shuffling through it, when all of a sudden she yelled out and then she started to stand up. Then she passed out right there.
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Dr. Balis:
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She fainted?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Yeah. I mean, I thought I was dreaming or something, you know? She just dropped down like a puppet whose strings had just been cut.
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Dr. Balis:
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Do you know why? What was it she saw?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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I looked through her mail and didn't see anything that stood out for me. The one thing that did strike my memory was when she announced she was going up to Vancouver, I remembered seeing a letter that had a return address in Canada. Mount Grouse or something, I think. But the name meant nothing to me.
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Dr. Balis:
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Where are you staying now?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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At the house.
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Dr. Balis:
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Are you alone there?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Well...no...sort of, but not really. I mean, Benny comes over when he's not at work. And my Aunt Sofie has been coming over every day to check up on me. But don't worry about me, Doctor, I really can take care of myself.
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Dr. Balis:
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I know that you believe that, Alex, but...
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Doctor! Please don't try to make me go somewhere else or do something that would get her in trouble. I'm okay there. I really am. She's done this kind of thing before. Not as dramatic as this, but...sometimes I wonder about her. No, I take that back. I wonder about her all the time. But really, my aunt is just a couple of blocks away, and Benny is always available to me.
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Dr. Balis:
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I was thinking about this person who you think may be following you...
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Oh, that. Yeah, that's kind of weird, huh?
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Dr. Balis:
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It's cause for concern, Alex. What's wrong? What are you thinking?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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I was just thinking about the way he looked. He did look familiar to me. And I'm wondering if...no, it couldn't be him.
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Dr. Balis:
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Who?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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It just hit me that he looks like that guy I beat up a few weeks ago. Nah, no way. It couldn't be him.
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Dr. Balis:
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You mean the one you were arrested for assaulting?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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He's the only one I've beaten up recently. But it couldn't be him--he didn't look quite right. He wouldn't be that bold, I mean, to follow me, or stalk me, or something like that. You think? He was threatening to sue me. But I mean, come on! He wouldn't be that stupid. I knew he wouldn't sue me. But stalk me? I never even thought about that.
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Dr. Balis:
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Hmm. I wouldn't rule that out. Alex, maybe you ought to think about getting the police involved. At least explain to Martin what's been going on. I really would hate to see anything...any repercussions come back to you on this. And if this adult trick is really stalking you...well, you know what I'm leading up to.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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I think so. The police would probably tell me that they couldn't do anything until he does something. They're good for nothing, you know.
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Dr. Balis:
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But maybe you ought to make a report about it anyway. Martin is there to help you out with this sort of thing, so why not utilize that resource? A report would be on file, just in case something does happen.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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I'll talk to him about it. I have to go over there today anyway.
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Dr. Balis:
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Good. Be cautious, Alex.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Always am, Doc. Hey, you know that thing you were telling me about the bucket and the water spilling over and all?
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Dr. Balis:
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Yes.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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That makes a lot of sense to me now. That would explain why I get so hyper and stuff.
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Dr. Balis:
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That's possible. There are some other medical things that I think we should look at as well.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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What? How do you mean?
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Dr. Balis:
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It's too early to make a diagnosis, Alex. But there are some medical conditions which could explain the symptoms that you've described, including Hypomania. Have you ever heard of it?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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What? You think I'm crazy, don't you?
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Dr. Balis:
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No, not at all. We need to explore this further, that's all.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Doctor, I don't have Hypo-whatever.
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Dr. Balis:
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I'm not saying that you do. But most people don't have such extreme periods of up and down. So I would like to discuss this a bit more next time, okay?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Whatever.
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Dr. Balis:
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Alex, we've run out of time for today. I want to give you my card again, in case you haven't kept it with you. Keep it with you and if you ever need anything, day or night, please don't hesitate to call me.
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Mr. Rozzi:
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Thanks, Doc. But I probably won't be in need of anything from you.
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Dr. Balis:
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Just in case, Alex. And like I said, day or night. If I'm not in, my answering service can always reach me. Keep it in mind, okay? I'll see you next week?
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Mr. Rozzi:
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I'll catch you later. Rage on, dude!
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Dr. Balis:
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Goodbye, Alex.
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###
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Doctor Balis' Notes on this Session
Transcripts of Alex Rozzi's Communications
