Transcript of 11th Session between Charles Balis, M.D. and Mr. Joseph Mazurka, Monday, October 7, 1996 at 10 am.

Mr. Mazurka: Hi Doc. You got my message about the change in the time, right?
Dr. Balis: Hi Joe. What happened to you?
Mr. Mazurka: You mean my eye? You should see the other guy.
Dr. Balis: You got into a fight?
Mr. Mazurka: I know what you're thinking, but it wasn't my fault.
Dr. Balis: Really? How did it start?
Mr. Mazurka: Well I was sitting at the bar, minding my own business; there's this place I go not far from where I'm staying in the Tenderloin, you know where that is?
Dr. Balis: Not the best part of town, but anyway...
Mr. Mazurka: Anyway I'm sitting there and this chick comes in, sits down next to me and orders a drink. So I pick up her tab, you know, and we get to talking--the usual sort of thing people talk about in bars: "Come here often?" and that kind of thing. I thought at first she's a working girl, a pro, but no, she just likes hanging out in places like that, catching a little atmosphere I guess. This place has got atmosphere, that's for sure; you can smell the can when you first walk in, but it sort of wears off after a while. But anyway, we're having our little chat when this guy comes up and grabs her shoulder from behind and says "What are you doing in here? You're leaving right now." So I said, "Wait a minute asshole, I was talking to this lady," and then I ask her if this man is annoying her. She doesn't say yes or no, but she looks scared and starts to run, with him after her. So I follow them outside and I ask this guy if he knows her and what right he has to come barging in like that, and--get this! It turns out he doesn't even know her fucking name. I guess he thinks she's some other chick. But he's still grabbing at her and I tell him to knock it off but he won't and she's starting to cry and all her makeup's running down her face. So I give him a shove and tell him to get lost, you know. And when I turn around to check out how the this girl is taking all this--like am I doing the right thing here?--he throws a sucker punch. I catch it in the eye when I turn around to see if he's split yet. So I let him have it. You should have seen him when I gave him a good shot in the guts. But he started it--I just finished up. He wasn't much of a fighter, really. He shouldn't have tried to take me on, that's for sure. Well it was all over pretty quick. Nobody even saw it, it was late and kind of dark. So I leave him there in the gutter--he looked like a lot of guys you see passed out around there, maybe with a little more blood and I turn around to Martha...
Dr. Balis: Martha?
Mr. Mazurka: Yeah, that's the chick's name. Anyway, she's all trembly and white, I'm afraid she's going to faint or something, right? She doesn't say shit, just sort of stares at me through these eyes that are looking like the Grand Canyon by now, so I take her over to my place. It's right next door, what else can I do? I wash her face. That helps, she doesn't look half bad under that make-up. So I get her a drink, she swallows the shit down like it's water. So I give her another one, but I've only got a half pint, there's one left for me. And then she starts to relax a little, still isn't talking, but she lies back on my bed and you know what?
Dr. Balis: What?
Mr. Mazurka: Well you've heard of someone letting down their hair? She's got her hair in this weird tight bun on the top of her head and it just unrolls. Her hair is perfectly nice--she looks a lot better with her hair down--I mean a lot better, but you can't tell 'em anything, can you? But where was I? Oh yeah, she's lying there on my bed, just kind of staring at me--well what's a guy supposed to think? She lets me take off her shoes, so I take off her pants and panties too--just roll them down her legs. She's not exactly helping but she's not objecting either, so I start to fuck her, it seems like the thing to do, right? But I've no sooner got it in, than she opens her eyes real wide and starts yelling and struggling. Well some chicks like it rough and I almost kept going, but all of a sudden I can tell she's really not into it anymore for some reason--it's like she's waking up from her dream or something and she doesn't know where she is or what's happening. Drugs maybe, who knows? But I'm the perfect gentleman, blue balls and all. No problem, whatever the lady wants. She grabs her pants, purse, and shoes and splits without her panties--no thanks or anything in spite of all I did for her. What the fuck, good looking but too weird in the head. Best piece of ass I've almost had in a month. At least I've still got her panties for a souvenir. With a good dog, maybe I could track her down--she never gave me her phone number. Yeah, aside from that little adventure, not a whole lot to report in the old love-life department.
Dr. Balis: It sounds liked you raped that woman.
Mr. Mazurka: Raped her? What the fuck? Are you out of your mind? Didn't you hear what I just told you? I stopped fucking her when she said no. There's no way you can call that rape.
Dr. Balis: Sounds like she was in shock and you started to have sex with her without her consent.
Mr. Mazurka: Man, I can tell you don't get laid much. You think you ask each woman, "Please Madam, may I fuck you now" just before you dick her? Get a life, faggot. That's just not how the game is played.
Dr. Balis: This was on Friday?
Mr. Mazurka: No, it was Thursday night.
Dr. Balis: Let's just change the subject here. You have no idea what happened to your wife and kids, do you?
Mr. Mazurka: No, what happened?
Dr. Balis: Well they disappeared, you know that?
Mr. Mazurka: I told you that weeks ago. You haven't heard from her either? I know she's kidnapped my kids. As soon as I can raise some money I'm going to hire some private dicks to go after her ass. She's fucking with the wrong Joe, that's all I can say. You been talking to the cops about this?
Dr. Balis: They called last week. I told them if they had any questions they should ask them to you directly.
Mr. Mazurka: Yeah, they've been doing that. But I don't need you talking about me behind my back especially with the cops. I don't know what kind of a guy they think I am, but I don't need you telling them I'm some kind of a nutcase. That's all it would take. I just don't know where you get off with all that commitment crap. I'm the sanest guy around this place, but I guess that's not saying a fuck of a lot. I swear, if I didn't have a few buddies whose heads are screwed on right, I'd really start to wonder.
Dr. Balis: Have you been spending a lot of time with your friends from the shooting range?
Mr. Mazurka: Yeah, fair amount. I've set up a sweet little Remington rifle, a real beauty! You should see it. I've got a scope on it that would blow your mind, with T-shaped crosshairs, so you get a great view. I can put a round in something as small as a quarter from a hundred yards away. Sometimes I sit in my room with the lights out, just looking at the world. It's amazing how many people don't draw their shades--you see some crazy shit going on.
Dr. Balis: You look into people's windows through your rifle scope?
Mr. Mazurka: What's the matter with that? I'm not sniping at them, I'm just watching, that's all. I'm sort of like Jimmy Stewart in that old Hitchcock film, where he's checking out his neighbors with his telephoto lens. Maybe I'll see a crime being committed and be a hero like him.
Dr. Balis: His camera lens wasn't on a rifle. I really don't think that's a good idea even if you are careful to make sure the gun isn't loaded and there isn't a bullet in the chamber. Have you been taking the medication I prescribed?
Mr. Mazurka: Yeah, didn't you notice how calm and collected I am? I'm not going to shoot anybody--nobody that isn't fucking with me anyway.
Dr. Balis: I'm telling you this for your own good. Don't you think the police can see you when you're doing this? You said they were asking you questions, don't you think they might be watching you too?
Mr. Mazurka: Are you trying to make me paranoid? And I came here for a cure! Just kidding Doc. You're probably right though, thanks for the tip. A word to the wise and all that. I suppose I can use all the help I can get, but don't get in my way, that's all I've got to say.
Dr. Balis: The time's about up. Are you coming back this time next week?
Mr. Mazurka: I'll think about it. I really think I'm cured of most of the stuff I came in with. My shoulder got better, and I guess my family problems disappeared along with my family. So what's the point?
Dr. Balis: People need to talk over their feelings with other people, in order to make sense of them. You are lucky enough to have a company-paid plan which pays me to do this with you. Who else would you share this stuff with, if it wasn't for me? Don't you feel the need to get things off your chest? I think you should stick with it, and maybe we can get your life on a more positive track okay?
Mr. Mazurka: Well whatever. I don't see how this particularly helps but you're the doc...
Dr. Balis: So I'll see you next week?
Mr. Mazurka: I guess. Bye.
Dr. Balis: Goodbye.
Arrow, Straight, Left, Earlier Arrow, Straight, Right, Later

Button to Dr. Balis' Notes Doctor Balis' Notes on this Session
Button to Phylis Birch's Patient File Phylis Birch's Patient File

Button to Joseph Mazurka's Transcripts Transcripts of Joseph Mazurka's Therapy Sessions
Button to Joseph Mazurka's File Joseph Mazurka's Patient File

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