Transcript of 48th Session between Charles Balis, M.D. and Mr. Alex Rozzi, Wednesday, June 3, 1998 at 5:00 pm.

Dr. Balis: Hello, Alex. What happened to your face? How did you get those scratches?
Mr. Rozzi: These are nothing; you should see my arm. See? Worse, a lot worse. I had to protect myself, otherwise she would have torn my face off. The bitch!
Dr. Balis: Regina?
Mr. Rozzi: Yeah! She finally attacked me. It's sort of a long story, so I'll try to condense it for you. It didn't occur to me that Cami and Regina would be at the Alliance because of the time of day. But they are already out of school, and their time is their own. I had a half-day at school myself and decided to put in some more hours. I realized the other day that it's going to take forever to get my community work done. I only have between sixty and seventy hours right now, and I need over a thousand more. It's going to take me years to get it all done!
Dr. Balis: It was a stern punishment.
Mr. Rozzi: You thought so, too? I thought at first, "Oh, a thousand and twenty five hours, that's nothing." Well, even if I worked at it full time, it would probably take more than a year. They caught me off guard, I guess. I forgot what we were talking about.
Dr. Balis: We were talking about how you got scratched up.
Mr. Rozzi: Yeah, yeah, right. Regina, the psycho-bitch...I should introduce her to my mother. Ha! Ha! So anyway, I had a half-day at school last week and thought I'd get in more hours at the Alliance. So I went over there not thinking that Cami and Regina could be there. And I...oh yeah, I almost forgot. Over the past couple of weeks, someone had been using my work area and leaving it a mess. They...she even broke one of the molds I was making for the sconces Josh and I designed. But I didn't put two and two together. I didn't even think that she was responsible for the damage, but she was. So when I got there, I went to talk to Josh about the molds and stuff. And then I looked over toward my storage locker and Regina was standing right in front of it. She didn't realize I was there, and she was doing something...I don't know what, but she was messing with my locker. Well, I went off.
Dr. Balis: What did you do?
Mr. Rozzi: I walked right over to her, and she was real surprised to see me there. She just froze for a minute, and I asked her what the hell she thought she was doing. Then she started swiping at me with her fingernails, and she was all swearing and calling me names: "Faggot! Queer!" And I was all: "Thank you, tell me something I didn't already know, bitch!" Then, when she actually got me a couple of times--she was going totally crazy, like a rabid animal or something, swinging and clawing at me--I got pissed off and pushed her real hard against the lockers. I pinned her there with all my weight.
Dr. Balis: Alex, you didn't...
Mr. Rozzi: No, I didn't hit her, but I should have. The bitch was calling me names. I wouldn't go that far--I wouldn't use her sexuality against her like that, you know? Plus, she scratched me up pretty good, there was a lot of blood. And then she spit in my face and hissed at me that it was all my fault that Cami doesn't want her anymore, that she's no longer interested. I was all: "It wasn't my fault." They were the ones who were pursuing me! By then, Josh and Cami got between us and split us apart. But Regina was still struggling to get at me, so I laughed at her and made things worse. So, anyway, that was when I finally came face to face with Cami.
Dr. Balis: How did you feel about that?
Mr. Rozzi: Well, that was the best part. I asked her what was up with that. What did Regina mean that she didn't want her anymore? She said, "That's right, I don't want to be with Regina anymore." But I told her that it wasn't my fault, that was her choice. That's when she dropped her bomb on me.
Dr. Balis: Bomb?
Mr. Rozzi: Yeah. You'll never guess. She told me that since the incident between her and me, and even before that, that she had started to feel differently about me. Her thoughts were always of me, she couldn't stop thinking about me, stuff like that. Well, she wants to be with me! With me! I mean picture that--her and me. I was like, "No way." Tony would have been rolling on the floor laughing over that. I was standing there looking at her and saying, "You can't really mean that, you aren't serious." She looked me square in the eye and said it again, "I want to be with you." I told her that it would never work. I'm gay, at least I'm supposed to be gay. And what about her? Isn't she a lesbian? I asked her that.
Dr. Balis: How did she respond?
Mr. Rozzi: Well, she didn't respond because she had to go see about Regina. So she just left me there to absorb this piece of news. I could she do this? How could she put me in the middle like that? I felt like this was her plan all along. What was she thinking? Did she think I would convert to heterosexuality? Gross! Things don't work that way. Plus, those two have already complicated my life enough, don't you think? I don't need this shit. So after they left--I mean like a split second after they were gone--Luke walked in. I was all, "Whew! Perfect timing." It was just what I needed--to have him see those two with me. What a pretty little picture that would have been.
Dr. Balis: Is Luke involved with the Arts Alliance, too?
Mr. Rozzi: No, not at all. He's too busy with his work. He just came there to meet me and see what I was working on. I'm always talking about my work at the Alliance. So I showed him everything, my paintings and the embellishments I did to the edges of the stage. I made it look like some old artisans carved these curly leafy things all around it. Josh taught me how to make a mold and then pour the plaster. Luke was very impressed. But then he asked me where the scratches came from.
Dr. Balis: What did you tell him?
Mr. Rozzi: The truth, for once. I figured that if he could forgive me the way he has, then he could handle the truth.
Dr. Balis: And did he?
Mr. Rozzi: Handle it? Yeah, for the most part. But he was pissed at Regina, I saw his face turn kind of red. You can tell when he is pissed because he quiets down, like the calm before the storm. But I knew he wasn't pissed at me. I think he was pissed at the situation. Josh said that if this sort of thing continues, someone is going to have to go, and he didn't mean me. So, I don't know...she's going to have to get over it herself or get de-clawed!
Dr. Balis: It's probably a good idea to keep your distance from her for now.
Mr. Rozzi: You're telling me. I know! But what really burned me up was Regina's sexist remarks to me designed to make me mad. I just thought she was so...I don't know, so childish. Sometimes, I think she's the female version of me. The stupid things she does...oh well. So, Tony has been busy this week, too busy for me even.
Dr. Balis: What is he busy doing?
Mr. Rozzi: I don't want to know, you know? He does his meetings, sometimes two or three a week. But I think he's spending a lot of time with that chick. What's her name? Sharon. Yeah, he's probably "doing" her. I don't know. Whatever. They're up to no good, I'm sure. He has been avoiding my calls, not returning them. I just hope he's not doing any speed again. I was thinking about calling his sister, Marney, to tell her about what's going on. I'm so worried. That girl is bad news. I just know she is.
Dr. Balis: Alex, what are you doing there?
Mr. Rozzi: Oh, sorry. It's just that my thumb itches something fierce. And no matter how much I scratch it, it doesn't help because the itch is deep inside. So I found that if I rub it like this, the itching feeling gets better, for a while at least.
Dr. Balis: The itching is a good sign. It means it's healing.
Mr. Rozzi: I know, that's what Mark told me. They cut their honeymoon short because both Mark and Aaron came down with the flu. It's been going around again. I never catch shit that goes around. But if it weren't for "Hell Nino," we wouldn't have to be putting up with all these bugs going around. All this rain and cold weather and shit is bad for one's health. When are we going to have some nice weather? I am so over this extended winter, you know?
Dr. Balis: Yes. I feel the same way.
Mr. Rozzi: So Mark laid it on the line for me.
Dr. Balis: Hmm?
Mr. Rozzi: I told you last time that he said he wanted to talk to me about something. Well, he laid it all out, nice and to the point. I guess now that he and my mom are finally married, he's going to play the father role.
Dr. Balis: What did he talk to you about?
Mr. Rozzi: Toughlove. Just as I expected. He basically told me, "No more shit." He expects me to behave myself--no drugs, no stealing, no driving. He told me that they are allowing me to stay with Ralph because it's easier on the family that way. But if it was up to him, he would have me staying at the house with them. I was like, "You're allowing me?" Huh! My mom doesn't want me around anyway. He said that they were considering having me go to a more local school for my senior year, and I said, "No way, dude!" I told him that I would pay for it myself--my tuition, I mean--before I'd go to a public school here in the city.
Dr. Balis: Sounds like he is trying to show you how much he cares about you.
Mr. Rozzi: Uh huh, right! He just wants to control me or something. He even said that they were considering sending me away to some camp thing. Yeah! Can you believe that? It's just like I suspected. But I got the last laugh there.
Dr. Balis: How so?
Mr. Rozzi: Well, how could they? If they try to send me away, I'd be in even more trouble because then, I would be violating my probation.
Dr. Balis: Good point.
Mr. Rozzi: Yeah, one they hadn't thought of. So things are the same, but different. I knew he would come back changed now that my mom has that ring on her finger. It's like she's got him wrapped, totally. She has her man, her kid, the house, all that. Well, soon enough, they won't be able to call the shots with me, not that they ever did, know what I mean. Eight months from now, I'll be eighteen. Then I can graduate from high school. And then, who knows? The possibilities are endless!
Dr. Balis: Well, I'm glad to see you're thinking ahead, Alex. But I think Mark might be looking out for your welfare. It's what a father is supposed to do.
Mr. Rozzi: Now, don't go jumping on their little bandwagon. You're supposed to be on my side.
Dr. Balis: Alex, there are no sides here. This is your family, your parents. They are trying to be just that, parents.
Mr. Rozzi: Yeah, yeah. Well, they should know by now--they can't control me or I'll walk, you know? So call me stubborn.
Dr. Balis: You certainly have your own mind.
Mr. Rozzi: And don't you forget it.
Dr. Balis: Okay, that's enough for today, Alex. I'll see you this same time next week, okay?
Mr. Rozzi: All right, dude. Thanks. And, Doctor Balis?
Dr. Balis: Yes?
Mr. Rozzi: Sorry for being such a shit.
Dr. Balis: No problem, Alex. Take care.
Mr. Rozzi: Later.
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